Sometimes your darkness swallows me and then gnaws at the core of my soul. It hurts so deep and so hard. Unbearable. A consuming fire. Your flames surround me. You trap me, screaming at me that I am not worth it. But that is where your power ends. Because I know what God says about my worth. You can set my emotions ablaze. And rip my heart right out of my chest. But as long as I know you lie, I win. I know that God is unchanging. And I know His love for me remains constant. I know I am His chosen. So, keep raging with in me. Go right ahead. You won’t keep me down. I have God on my side. You WILL still lose this battle.
Child of God
Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? And not one of them is forgotten before God. Why, even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not; you are of more value than many sparrows. Luke 12:6-7
Dear Child of God,
I whisper in your ear all day long. I tell you how much you hate yourself. I interpret your own awkwardness for rejection and failure. I stab your heart and convince you that you are not strong enough to survive. And you carry my heavy burden. I distract you and overwhelm you with emotion. Because I don’t want you to know how much Jesus loves you. I want you cold and disconnected. But, the truth is that you have the power of the God of the Universe living inside you. If you refuse me, He conquers me. If you listen to my voice whispering in your ear, you will continue to struggle. The choice is yours. As God’s chosen, you have the power to overcome. You are strong. Because He is strong.
Finally be strong in the Lord and in His mighty power. Ephesians 6:10
Dear Child of God,
I isolate you. Make you feel ashamed. You wake up to faces flying through the walls. And spiders engulfing you. You are afraid to move. Sometimes, you don’t know what is real. And so you keep quiet. I make you feel so alone. And I whisper in your ear that if you let people in, you will not only be alone.. but you will also be rejected. And since I have spent a lifetime driving the fear of rejection deep into your soul, you won’t take the path of vulnerability. I make sure of it. The moment you step out, I harm you. I shame you. Terrify your mind. But you do have a choice. You can live in my rejection and fear. You can live according to how I’ve made you feel. Or you can choose to believe what God has to say. Even when it is so hard to fathom. I try to distract you so that you will not remember that God says that you are His chosen. Chosen. And that even on those days when you can’t muster the energy for just one more moment, He is holding you up. And many times, that means that He places His people directly in your path. To hold your hand. And hold you up. And help you. Never forget that you are chosen. And certainly not rejected. You are His dearly, loved child.
You are my servant; I have chosen you, not rejected you. So do not fear for I am with you. Do not be dismayed for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will uphgold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:9 NIV